“Chapter 5 of When I Spotted Him…“❤
Well there you have it- the efforts of poetessakosua reader pressure. I feel as though i haven’t been the best version of me in recent times when it comes to storytelling, so i guess it doesn’t hurt to give you what you want. Chapter 1, 2,3 and 4 got many of you texting me for Chapter 5. Been so long that you have probably forgotten the story (sorry!) so please feel free to refresh your memory.
He still got it and he could still get it. I sheepishly thought to myself. I curved out a smile, an attempt to mask the glooming sadness that was building up around me. He was here. He was finally here, with me after one whole year. I pinched myself, I had waited for him. My love for him still intact.
He will never be mine I keep reminding myself whenever we went out on a date, to the movies, sat together, crack jokes, shared testimonies, I remembered as I stared at him in awe and longing for the good old days when he was around me but those days had already come to pass, and if there is one thing I knew then is that wishes aren’t horses and even if they were, my dispirited self would be unable to ride. This man that I loved, this man that my broken heart had longed for was standing in front of me and I did not know what to do with him. I did not know how to act, what to say.
“Should I hug him, should I kiss?”
I deliberated with myself and when the deliberation bore no fruits I started shaking. I was nervous. It felt like we were meeting for the very first time and rightfully so because its only in that moment that I realized I knew so little of him. He, on the other hand, never made an attempt to know me, my family, my likes, dislikes, my perfume he only knew me for my old-fashioned nature and creative pieces. I was hurt and needed to run away from all this drama before I lost my sanity.
Finally, an opportunity presented itself and I went on a faraway land in search of greener pastures. The nature of work in a new environment and office gave little time to reminisce on my past and brood over my heart desires. Many a time, you will find me lost in thoughts and I’ll console myself with these words:
Akosua, you know better than anyone else that love can’t be fixed and its certainly not a puzzle. You will find someone better than Kay.
Its just not easy saying all these encouraging words and then life continues as if nothing is happening. I never kept an image of him because, it was not worth it. I gave it time and gave work my all; kept fasting and praying to God.
Chapter 5 of my story was written before the events unfolded. It was to me like a premonition meant to happen before everything and there was no way I could have prevented this chapter from happening. The little and cute gifts you received was my own way of saying,
Goodbye friend, use this to remember me and whenever you come across this book of mine, don’t be sarcastic about it. Rather, see it as the many twist and turns to love life many ladies go through or rather, the ordeal that some of us who are not hypocrites express love without fear.
An advice from a friend reminded me I had made a terrible mistake of my life by expressing what I felt. To him, you should be 100% sure if a guy is into you before coming out blatantly to return that kind of love. But my point is, there were signs and flirty acts too- I guess I mistook it to be “This is my kind of Woman.”
Yassss! So Chapter 5 ends here. Guys, Chapter 6 will be published soon. Love y’all.